As fast as a week goes, here it is again. Remember how I extolled the lovely virtues of a New Hampshire Spring? Fuck that, we just got six inches of snow. Everyone had removed their snow tires (except for yours truly) drained gas from the snow blowers hung up the skis and retired the snow mobiles, and now this shit! WTF! Oh, well--not like it really affects me!
Since I lost my beloved Fuso last week I've been stuck with a foul and miserable replacement; a discarded truck from years past; cast aside because of her looks and age. I anxiously await reuniting with my beloved! It would be pointless to go in to details about how poor of a replacement this truck is, not only to my readers but to my bosses as well.
Get this--top speed of 60mph, compared to my baby who will hit 85+; no turbo, and no automatic. I am a huge fan of standard transmissions but not on this truck. It's a real POS!
To make a long story longer, I suffer through a long route today with this miserable POS and make people happy, which is what I do best. As I am on my way to another customer's home heading up I93 I pass a State Pooper sitting in the median; no big deal say I since I can't event hit 65.
A few miles later none other than officer Dan in NH DMV SUV puts his lights on and interrupts me from my work. I was pissed! The goon in black walks up on the driver side and I recognize him from the last time I got stopped working for the company; in a shitty rental truck. Even mentioned it to him, but he didn't seem to remember me.
He asked for my papers, the shipping papers, registration, physical card, commercial drivers license. Then he asked me where I came from and where I was headed. Hands trembling, looking at that gun, I answered honestly.
He asked me if I had any questions. I looked at him and said, "Yes--do you target bad looking trucks? Because to be honest this truck looks terrible."
He responded that "the New Hampshire DMV looks for box trucks leased and rental vehicles without company names "because you never know who or what may be in them.'"
Buzz off, Officer whateveryournameis because you are going on a fishing-trip!! As long as my name isn't Mohammed and I don't drive explosives in a Ryder truck I'm going to go free.
Luckily, for me, I was allowed to pass on and do my damn job about ten minutes later. I told the customer about what happened and they had a good laugh, after a nervous giggle regarding what I told them about police. Their parting words, "Don't get picked up!" I'm not joking.
Since I lost my beloved Fuso last week I've been stuck with a foul and miserable replacement; a discarded truck from years past; cast aside because of her looks and age. I anxiously await reuniting with my beloved! It would be pointless to go in to details about how poor of a replacement this truck is, not only to my readers but to my bosses as well.
Get this--top speed of 60mph, compared to my baby who will hit 85+; no turbo, and no automatic. I am a huge fan of standard transmissions but not on this truck. It's a real POS!
To make a long story longer, I suffer through a long route today with this miserable POS and make people happy, which is what I do best. As I am on my way to another customer's home heading up I93 I pass a State Pooper sitting in the median; no big deal say I since I can't event hit 65.
A few miles later none other than officer Dan in NH DMV SUV puts his lights on and interrupts me from my work. I was pissed! The goon in black walks up on the driver side and I recognize him from the last time I got stopped working for the company; in a shitty rental truck. Even mentioned it to him, but he didn't seem to remember me.
He asked for my papers, the shipping papers, registration, physical card, commercial drivers license. Then he asked me where I came from and where I was headed. Hands trembling, looking at that gun, I answered honestly.
He asked me if I had any questions. I looked at him and said, "Yes--do you target bad looking trucks? Because to be honest this truck looks terrible."
He responded that "the New Hampshire DMV looks for box trucks leased and rental vehicles without company names "because you never know who or what may be in them.'"
Buzz off, Officer whateveryournameis because you are going on a fishing-trip!! As long as my name isn't Mohammed and I don't drive explosives in a Ryder truck I'm going to go free.
Luckily, for me, I was allowed to pass on and do my damn job about ten minutes later. I told the customer about what happened and they had a good laugh, after a nervous giggle regarding what I told them about police. Their parting words, "Don't get picked up!" I'm not joking.
posted by Insurgent at 9:59 PM
5 Comments:
Mohomad drove by as the officer was busy handeling your case. NH finest sounds like the finest we have here at home.
o'er the ramparts we watch, were so gallantly streaming?
Reminds me of the old Clint Eastwood movie I think called "Firefox" about the secret Russian warplane that Clint was going to steal for the "good guys". Anyway he hooks up with some Russian dissidents in Siberia and they talk about how an unmarked truck will always be pulled over by the cops.
Sounds like the Russians are better off than we are now.
The funniest part of the story, I forgot to mention--
As the pig was walking around the truck, telling me to test various lights and signals, he came to the rear of the truck.
My left foot hovering on the clutch and right on the throttle I awaited the command for "reverse" but it never came. DAMNIT!
That kid out in Virginia used him a Walther .22. That makes two of you.
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